Jim Davidson Announces New Tour

Friend of the show and official sponsor of Episode 2 of The Tabbzy and Charltzy Show, Jim Davidson, announced today that he is to launch a brand new stand up comedy tour next February.


Titled "Straight, White and English" the stand-up routine will touch on many aspects of British life, mainly hatred towards anyone not white.
Jim said that despite the title of the tour, he invites people of all colours and race to come along to the show as he said "It should be a good laugh, as it helps the flow of comedy".

Disabled parking is not provided for show attendees, in fact Mr Davidson has specifically asked all ramps for wheelchair access to be removed from the theatres he will be playing at.

"Seeing them disabled fellas really brings down the mood of the show" he said in a press statement about the tour.

Tickets will be available for booking from the 12th of January, exclusively on the BNP website. A discount is available if you are any of the following:

*Over 50 years of age and never been to a foreign country (Passport required as proof)

*A dishonourably discharged member of the Armed Services.
*A group of 5 or more skinheads. (BNP Cards required)
*On the Dole or Jobseekers allowance (No job in past 5+ years only)

*Have only white friends (Full printout of Facebook friends required)

Tabbzy's Bollywood Film Moves Into Post-Production

The film previously known as "Dance, Shoot, Sing" has found itself a new director and title as it movies into post-production.
Due to copyright infringements with 459 other movies, the film has now be renamed to "Mission: Undanceable".

Director Ashad Speilbergas describes the movie as "a violent cop thriller, based firmly on real life events".
When asked if it would conform to Bollywood stereotypes he answered "categorically not, it's far from your typical Bollywood movie, for a start we have hardly any dance scenes in it"
When pushed for examples he replied; " In one shoot-out and torture scene we even reduced it to just four dance routines."

Mr Speilbergas said that production is well under way and the Summer 2009 release date is looking likely to be honoured.

Matt Groening Kills Self After Watching 20th Season of The Simpsons

Creator of the SImpsons, Matt "Groaning" Groening ended his own life yesterday in the office of his Los Angleles home.

Long honoured for creating 10 seasons of fantastic shows, Mr Groening had since handed production over to new younger writers at FOX.
The show had been running for 10 more seasons since then - the newest 20th season airing last month.
Unbeknownst to his ex-coworkers and family, Groening had not watched a single episode since he left the show ten years ago.

The shock of seeing how poor the show had become was too much to bear for him, so he took his own life with a necktie attached to a roof beam, believed to be emblazoned with the one-liner from the show "Eat My Shorts".

Police found Mr Groening, known as "Groanzy" to his friends, surrounded by several pre-release DVDs of the hideous 20th season of the show and a suicide note which read as follows:

"They killed it. I can't believe how much they killed it. I swear I didn't know. May God forgive me for unleashing this on the world -M.G".

A memorial service will be held for Groanzy later in the week.

Apple CEO Steve Jobs Endorses the BanterCast, Right to Marry Goats.

Steve Jobs with his shocking announcement earlier this week.

In a press conference held in California, USA early Friday morning, Director of Apple Computers, Steve "On The Job" Jobs announced that the Tabbzy and Charltzy Show would finally be available on the iTunes Music Store for download.

He apologised to fans for the delay, but as with all podcasts submitted to the online service, it had to go through a vigorous scanning to check for swearing, inappropriate language and insults to foreigners.
Thankfully it had just enough to pass Apples required amount.

Bizarrely, immediately after the event, Mr Jobs, known as "Jobzy" to his friends, was heard to mention one of his close relatives was to marry a farmyard goat, and that people "shouldn't be so snobby about who people choose for their wives".

Whether this damages the BanterCast reputation remains to be seen.

To subscribe to the BanterCast and receive all future episodes directly to your iTunes podcast page, you really should click the link below, or go to the iTunes store and search for "BanterCast".

I want to subscribe to the banter in iTunes!

The BanterCast: Episode 2 "J.D Baracus"

Episode 2 - "J.D Baracus". The BanterCast, AKA The Tabbzy & Charltzy Show.

Visualise the banter with banterous images, only available on an iPod made after 1985.

This week the lads:
*Run through the mailbag
*I can't believe I found that on the internet!
*Run down the Top 10 most livable places
*I can't believe they do that!

and more!

This Episode was brought to you by "J.D Baracus"

Download Episode 2

BanterCast Show Notes: Episode 2

The long awaited sequel to "The Tabbzy and Charltzy Show Episode 1" is finally available!

Now we finally decided on a structure to the show, everything seems a little bit more organised, but still equally, if not more Banterific.

We delve into our Mailbag, do a new top 10, blather about weird things from Pakistan and Japan and get sponsorship from a right-wing comedian, all in one episode!

At one point we recreate the phone conversation between a Japanese/Cockney Policeman and a crazed murderer.

It'll make sense when you listen to the show.

Download Episode 2

Japan Accepts Music Honour at International Music Awards

Last Saturday's prestigious International Music Awards (IMA's) was home to musicians from all over the world.
Japan was recognised for it's contribution to the music scene after a 35-year-run of awardless ceremonies.


President Takashi Iwata accepted the award for "Worst Music Industry in the World" at the ceremony with a tear in his eye.

"Finally the music we produce has been recognised for what it is, simply the worst written, sung and produced recordings of the entire civilised world"

He received a 10 minute standing ovation after his speech.

But it didn't stop there for Japan, later in the evening they also picked up; Worst Female Singer, Worst Male Performer, Most Ridiculous use of English in a Song, Most Out of Tune, Most Nonsensical Lyrics, Worst Band Name (for "Bump of Chicken") and Most Obviously Untalented and Heavily Over Promoted to Idiots Who Don't Know Better (Ayumi Hamasaki)


Ayumi Hamasaki accepting her "Most Obviously Untalented and Heavily Over Promoted to Idiots Who Don't Know Better" award at IMA 2008.

Charltzy Scandal Update: Charltzy sleeps nude in Oxygen tent which he believes gives him sexual Powers

A woman reacts to the news that Charltzy is once again sleeping nude. Stock photo Courtesy of Tabbzy Images Inc.

Thats right, sexual predator J.R.R Charltzy , (Known Aliases' : The Fiddler , Gary"Charltzy"Glitter, Hernandez Pedo, The Snake Charmer, One eyed Jackass, Tom,Dicks and Harry) has been spotted sleeping nude in a futuristic oxygen tent not unlike one that Micheal Jackson used to bathe'...

Charltzy was not availible for comment but his press assistant did remark to reporters camped outside his Tokyo apartment that accusations are only "a half truth"..

Stay tuned for the latest scandal updates....

Tabbzy

BanterCast Show Notes: Episode 1

This week saw the very first excitingly banterous episode of T.A.Cs ( the Tabzy and Charltzy show) live from our bedrooms across the globe. My good self and Charltzy have ended up both living in Asia from our native England, and this bantercast is window into our mutual madness/weekly dose of banter sanity therapy. Welcome to our domain of banter.....

Our first ep we surf our banter waves over such exciting topics as "Top 10 dirtiest names in sport" and I suddenly realise my BBC homepage is providing me with penis enlargement ads... yes folks thats the target world we live in today, even residing in a Islamic state where its strictly forbidden! ... U cannot put a price as they say... ON BANTER.

Download Episode 1

The BanterCast: Episode 1 "Banterous Introductions"

Episode 1 - "Banterous Introductions". The BanterCast, AKA The Tabbzy & Charltzy Show.

This episode has been re-banterised with banterous images throughout the show, you'll need a colour iPod or similar device to witness the banter though, innit.

This week the lads:
*Introduce themselves a bit
*Talk about the iTunes and potential rapper names
*Talk about the US Presidential candidates
*Discuss potentially war-creating Ads on the BBC website
*Run down the Top 10 dirtiest sportstars names

and more!

This Episode was brought to you by "Anti-Ethno Food Science Corp."

Download Episode 1

Tabbzy to Star in Bollywood Epic

Tabbzy drew huge crowds in Pakistan yesterday with his announcement that he was to star in a Bollywood movie.

Tabbzy had previously been a campaigner against Bollywood movies, but had recently had a change of heart.
"I saw one on TV the other night and it was alright" he said, leaving his hotel room.

Tentatively titled "Dance, Shoot, Sing" the action cop movie intends to break the mold of traditional Bollywood movies by featuring less than 35 dancing and singing scenes, apposed to the usual 120 required by the government.

Dance, Shoot, Sing does not have a final release date as yet, but hopes are for a Summer 2009 release.